Wednesday, 1 August 2012

Strongly Worded Email Central.

For legal reasons, as much as I'd like to, I will not name and shame the organisation that has caused me to type this email with a cross face, biting a pen very hard.

I've taken out anything that may finger point in their specific direction, but they know who they are, and yes, they are a dedicated military charity. Some of you know which one, please DO NOT mention their name if you comment.

My actions are not to cause trouble, get anyone in trouble, take legal action or anything like it. My actions are simply to get my Husband the help and support he is entitled to and deserves. This has NOT been forthcoming and I'm fed up of being nicey nice about it. That approach has not worked - their year long lack of contact is proof.

Anyhoo, here it is.


I'm glad I have your email address now.

Sadly things are not at all well with us. Steve's deterioration is rapid and he has now been in hospital for a month, for the second time in 2 months.

You're quite right, you tried multiple times to contact me last Friday but I was unavailable to speak as I was doing voluntary work which was very demanding. I had received a phone call not 20 mins earlier from the newspaper that had run a story on Steve and the lack of support and treatment he's been lumbered with. The phone call was to ask me if it was O.K. to pass on my details to ############# who had been alerted to the story and wanted to make urgent contact.

We have not had any contact from anyone at ########  since shortly after moving into our new property. That was a year ago now, and  despite your knowing that Steve's condition was at that time severe, deteriorating and severely limiting. Now its 500 times worse.

To say that we. once again, feel unsurprised, let down, unsupported, disappointed etc,would be pointless as I've already made my feelings clear. The last time we spoke (that was when you dropped of the file of our personal documents that had been kept in your office for multiple months and was only returned on the strength of a telephone call from ###############) so I needn't bother address that point.

Steve can no longer speak for himself fully, see, hear, walk, travel any distance at all and is losing the will to live. He needs support and he needs it urgently.

I should not have to come to you. I should not have to have an article published for you to contact us.  I should not have to rely on prompts from other agencies to create action. You have not called around (we live ## miles from your office), left us a message (we have 4 phones in the family), sent us a newsletter in the post (we had our post re-directed from our old address for 6 months), an email, a poke on Facebook or re-Tweeted any of my posts. I think that covers most types of modern communications.

I have no faith that if I ask you for any help, support, assistance that I will get any. I have asked in the past and due to inaction or "error" none has been forthcoming.

Specifically, I am referring to the main source of our disappointment (aside from the lack of contact, not fulfilling promises). The fact that you were asked to secure funding for us to physically move from our home into our tiny, inappropriate council bungalow. My daughter (then aged 16) and I moved the entire house in the back of our car, alone. Apparently, an email was sent to me saying that the "quotes I had provided were not the sort of companies that ###### wanted to use" but I did not receive that email, and did anyone chase it up to see what was happening or why I'd not submitted more quotes? No. We were left to cope alone.

I am forwarding this email to the main ########## "contact us" address (via the website), the area office and I will be discussing it with our new ####### who is coming to meet me tomorrow afternoon. I am also forwarding it to ####### who was last year acting as an advocate for us to help our situation and will be able to verify my despair and also tried to get ######### branch to support us.

I'll also be publishing it (personal details omitted) on my blog, and I am happy to verify any statement I have made. I also have a Facebook group called "Fighting For Steve" which has over 350 "likes". The blog gets shared on there. There's an article going to be in the Western Mail tomorrow too - I'm hoping for a lot more "likes".

I appreciate that the services charities are very busy, some may say "saturated" and with no extra manpower/funding to cope. I appreciate it but it isn't my problem. Steve has been told for his whole career that ########## (and others) would "have his back" if the worst happens. 

Far, far worse than the worst has happened. 

Bethan Brunell


  1. I have no idea about the agency you are talking about , but whoever they are they should be ashamed

  2. Thank you. We'll see what happens, I don't think it's going to be pretty.

    Shame, isn't it?

    Betty Xx

  3. Bethan

    This makes me immensely sad as a RAF wife, I am utterly disappointed in your experience with those agencies. I have always thought if anything, god forbid, happened to my husband I would always be able to turn to them for support.

    I have a friend who is volunteering with a service support agency and if it is ok with you I would like to ask her to look into it, would that be ok with you?

    Keep strong, you are doing an amazing job.